Labor Day: Don't drink and drive

How many drinks would it take to be considered drunk? Too drunk to drive? Have you ever wondered....okay have you ever wondered this BEFORE you started drinking and not after?





Okay, one (1) drink per hour is a safe calculation.....it's too hot after that long.

Here is a calculator that tells you (estimate) what your BAC (Blood Alcohol Count) would be after so many drinks in so many hours.....COOL!! BUT.....I just learned that if I have four (4) beers at 6% alcohol in 2 1/12 hours oops DUI. This shocked me because when I have four (4) beers at 6% alcohol in 2 1/2 hours I FEEL FINE....I guess that's where the impairment comes in huh?

So here's the thing. No one wants you to drive drunk or impaired....even bar owners. If you aren't safe you won't return, am I right? It used to be called a $10,000 DUI...well those days are over because the with the increase of insurance, legal fees, fines, bail it could be up to $25,000 when you are finished.....that is $6250.00 PER BEER I just had. MSN has a breakdown of most fees that may be incurred with a DUI. (MSN Money arrive alive).

It is important that if you are going to be drinking please do not drive. Get a designated driver, call a cab or call a friend (hopefully not the friend who was sitting next to you drinking with you). I am going to have to call someone or have a designated driver as the calculator says I am allowed two (2) beers at 6% alcohol in a 2 1/2 hour time span.

Labor Day is a great day to celebrate...just do it safe!!

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What is aggressive driving

We have all gotten angry while driving.  We have all either honked, or wanted to honk, at someone who has cut us off.  Some of us have actually given a few "gestures" while passing someone who has angered us on the road.

Matthew Joint, Head of Behavioral Analysis, states that in 1995 tailgating was the most common form of "road rage" followed closely flashing your headlights at someone.

Statistics show that 250,000 people have died in traffic since 1990. It is believed that two-thirds of these deaths are at least partially caused by aggressive driving, although only 218 were found to be a direct cause of angry drivers. According to the National Highway Traffic Safety Administration (NHTSA), 66 percent of all annual traffic fatalities are caused by aggressive driving actions, such as passing on the right, running red lights and tailgating. In addition to fatalities, there have been an estimated 20 million injuries; 12,610 caused by aggressive driving. These numbers show that there has been a 51 percent increase in aggressive driving incidents since 1990. Of these incidents, 37 percent involved the use of a firearm, 28 percent involved other weapons, and 35 percent involved the use of a car as a weapon. Related to this increase in aggressive driving incidents may be the fact that the number of drivers on the road is increasing; as of 1990, 91 percent of people drove to work.

This video is a minor incident of road rage but it's these minor incidents that, if they happen with the wrong person, could lead to car accident injuries or death.

In this video it was very fortunate that no one was injured or killed by this person who displayed extreme road rage.

Dr. John A. Larson, author of Steering Clear of Highway Madness, groups aggressive drivers into five categories: Speeders, passive aggressors, narcissists, vigilantes, and competitors. Several characteristics are related to the most typical aggressive driver: being under 35, single, no education and a mid-level income. Furthermore, although women are more likely to confess to angry driving, men are more likely to participate in true “road rage”, in which an angry driver intentionally harms another driver. Whether or not an aggressive driver takes physical action depends on the degree of anger he or she feels. “If someone pulls out in front of you or cuts you off, you may be justified at four or five on a scale of 10…if you’re up to seven to 10, though, that’s an exaggerated response,” says Larson.
Redford Williams, M.D., at Duke University, points to a hostile personality type as an indicator of someone who is more likely to get angry quicker. “They are also four to seven times more likely to die of other health problems by age 50 than are even-tempered people,” said Williams. For example, people with long drives to work are found to have higher blood pressure than people who take shorter routes to work. One frustrated commuter states, “it feels unnatural to forget about the jerk riding my tail or ducking in front of me to save half a second and some drivers—not me, of course – respond to overaggressive road behavior as if piloting a car were a contest. They drive to ‘win’ rather than simply to get to their destination.”

If you are an aggressive driver pay close attention to what Dr. John A. Larson says:  there is a reason you are an aggressive driver and it could be because of other issues in your life that could lead to health problems.

If you are a victim caught in the crosswinds of an aggressive driver remain calm and get away from the driver.  Never pull over in a deserted area.  Get the license plate of the aggressive driver and if you have a cell phone call 911.

Remember, no one's life is worth a little anger.  No death is acceptable under these conditions.  Please drive safe.



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Part of the problem or part of the SOLUTION: Suicide

I can't imagine there is anyone who doesn't know someone who has attempted suicide, committed suicide or has lost someone to suicide.  




When things get tough...sometimes people don't see any other option.  It has to be a difficult situation to be in.  It's horrible for the person who attempts or commits suicide and it's horrible for their family and friends who are left with unanswered questions.




The following statistics are from the American Foundation for Suicide Prevention and the information belongs to them:  

National Statistics

General

• Over 36,000 people in the United States die by suicide every year.
• In 2009 (latest available data), there were 36,909 reported suicide deaths.
• Suicide is the fourth leading cause of death for adults between the ages of 18 and 65 years in the United States.
• Currently, suicide is the 10th leading cause of death in the United States.
• A person dies by suicide about every 15 minutes in the United States.
• Every day, approximately 101 Americans take their own life.
• Ninety percent of all people who die by suicide have a diagnosable psychiatric disorder at the time of their death.
• There are four male suicides for every female suicide, but three times as many females as males attempt suicide.
• There are an estimated 8-25 attempted suicides for every suicide death.

Youth

• Suicide is the sixth leading cause of death among those 5-14 years old.
• Suicide is the third leading cause of death among those 15-24 years old.
• Between the mid-1950s and the late 1970s, the suicide rate among U.S. males aged 15-24 more than tripled (from 6.3 per 100,000 in 1955 to 21.3 in 1977). Among females aged 15-24, the rate more than doubled during this period (from 2.0 to 5.2). The youth suicide rate generally leveled off during the 1980s and early 1990s, and since the mid-1990s has been steadily decreasing.
• Between 1980-1996, the suicide rate for African-American males aged 15-19 has also doubled.
• Risk factors for suicide among the young include suicidal thoughts, psychiatric disorders (such as depression, impulsive aggressive behavior, bipolar disorder, certain anxiety disorders), drug and/or alcohol abuse and previous suicide attempts, with the risk increased if there is situational stress and access to firearms.

Older People

• The suicide rates for men rise with age, most significantly after age 65.
• The rate of suicide in men 65+ is seven times that of females who are 65+.
• The suicide rates for women peak between the ages of 45-54 years old, and again after age 75.
• About 60 percent of elderly patients who take their own lives see their primary care physician within a few months of their death.
• Six to 9 percent of older Americans who are in a primary care setting suffer from major depression.
• More than 30 percent of patients suffering from major depression report suicidal ideation.
• Risk factors for suicide among the elderly include: a previous attempt, the presence of a mental illness, the presence of a physical illness, social isolation (some studies have shown this is especially so in older males who are recently widowed) and access to means, such as the availability of firearms in the home.

What are the warning signs for suicide?  (Copied from the Cleveland Clinic)

1. Following are some of the possible warning signs that a person may be at risk for suicide:
2. Excessive sadness or moodiness — Long-lasting sadness and mood swings can be symptoms of depression, a major risk factor for suicide.
3. Sudden calmness — Suddenly becoming calm after a period of depression or moodiness can be a sign that the person has made a decision to end his or her life.
4. Withdrawal — Choosing to be alone and avoiding friends or social activities also are possible symptoms of depression. This includes the loss of interest or pleasure in activities the person previously enjoyed.
5. Changes in personality and/or appearance — A person who is considering suicide might exhibit a change in attitude or behavior, such as speaking or moving with unusual speed or slowness. In addition, the person might suddenly become less concerned about his or her personal appearance.
6. Dangerous or self-harmful behavior — Potentially dangerous behavior, such as reckless driving, engaging in unsafe sex, and increased use of drugs and/or alcohol might indicate that the person no longer values his or her life.
7. Recent trauma or life crisis — A major life crises might trigger a suicide attempt. Crises include the death of a loved one or pet, divorce or break-up of a relationship, diagnosis of a major illness, loss of a job, or serious financial problems.
8. Making preparations — Often, a person considering suicide will begin to put his or her personal business in order. This might include visiting friends and family members, giving away personal possessions, making a will, and cleaning up his or her room or home. Some people will write a note before committing suicide.
9. Threatening suicide — Not everyone who is considering suicide will say so, and not everyone who threatens suicide will follow through with it. However, every threat of suicide should be taken seriously.

What should I do if someone I know is talking about committing suicide?

1. If someone you know is threatening suicide, take the threat seriously.
2. Do not leave the person alone. If possible, ask for help from friends or other family members.
3. Ask the person to give you any weapons he or she might have. Take away sharp objects or anything else that the person could use to hurt himself or herself.
4. Try to keep the person as calm as possible.
5. Call 911 or take the person to an emergency room.

Suicide is a silent killer....if it wasn't silent we could prevent more of them.  Often we don't even realize a person is thinking of suicide.  Maybe if we understand the statistics and signs to watch out for we can be part of the solution.

Great song about suicide and tribute to some who have lost their lives. Please watch, listen and learn.  Be strong, be aware and be part of the solution.

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Part of the problem or part of the SOLUTION: Child abuse and neglect

Five (5) children each DAY die of child abuse or neglect.  (Childhelp)

3.3 million reports
6 million children abused

The numbers are staggering.  We are supposed to be a civilized Country but we are destroying our future by destroying our children.

Copied directly from Childhelp website:  (This information belongs to Childhelp.  For more information you can go directly to their page)

• A report of child abuse is made every ten seconds
• *More than five children die every day as a result of child abuse.² 
• Approximately 80% of children that die from abuse are under the age of 4. ¹
• It is estimated that between 50-60% of child fatalities due to maltreatment are not recorded as such on death certificates. ³
• More than 90% of juvenile sexual abuse victims know their perpetrator in some way. ⁴
• Child abuse occurs at every socioeconomic level, across ethnic and cultural lines, within all religions and at all levels of education.
• About 30% of abused and neglected children will later abuse their own children, continuing the horrible cycle of abuse. ⁵
• About 80% of 21 year olds that were abused as children met criteria for at least one psychological disorder. ⁵
• The estimated annual cost of child abuse and neglect in the United States for 2008 is $124 billion. ⁶

• 14% of all men in prison in the USA were abused as children. ⁷
• 36% of all women in prison were abused as children. ⁷
• Children who experience child abuse & neglect are 59% more likely to be arrested as a juvenile, 28% more likely to be arrested as an adult, and 30% more likely to commit violent crime. ⁵
• 
  

• Abused children are 25% more likely to experience teen pregnancy. ⁵
• Abused teens are less likely to practice safe sex, putting them at greater risk for STDs. 

• One-third to two-thirds of child maltreatment cases involve substance use to some degree. ⁸
• Children whose parents abuse alcohol and other drugs are three times more likely to be abused and more than four times more likely to be neglected than children from non-abusing families. ⁸
• As many as two-thirds of the people in treatment for drug abuse reported being abused or neglected as children. ¹⁰
• 
  

Signs of Child Abuse and Neglect:

Recognizing Child Abuse (Copied directly from U.S. Department of Health & Human Services.  This information belongs to them)

The following signs may signal the presence of child abuse or neglect.
The Child:

• Shows sudden changes in behavior or school performance
• Has not received help for physical or medical problems brought to the parents' attention
• Has learning problems (or difficulty concentrating) that cannot be attributed to specific physical or psychological causes
• Is always watchful, as though preparing for something bad to happen
• Lacks adult supervision
• Is overly compliant, passive, or withdrawn
• Comes to school or other activities early, stays late, and does not want to go home

The Parent:

• Shows little concern for the child
• Denies the existence of—or blames the child for—the child's problems in school or at home
• Asks teachers or other caregivers to use harsh physical discipline if the child misbehaves
• Sees the child as entirely bad, worthless, or burdensome
• Demands a level of physical or academic performance the child cannot achieve
• Looks primarily to the child for care, attention, and satisfaction of emotional needs

The Parent and Child:

• Rarely touch or look at each other
• Consider their relationship entirely negative
• State that they do not like each other

Types of Abuse

The following are some signs often associated with particular types of child abuse and neglect: physical abuse, neglect, sexual abuse, and emotional abuse. It is important to note, however, that these types of abuse are more typically found in combination than alone. A physically abused child, for example, is often emotionally abused as well, and a sexually abused child also may be neglected.

Signs of Physical Abuse

Consider the possibility of physical abuse when the child:
Has unexplained burns, bites, bruises, broken bones, or black eyes
Has fading bruises or other marks noticeable after an absence from school
Seems frightened of the parents and protests or cries when it is time to go home
Shrinks at the approach of adults
Reports injury by a parent or another adult caregiver

Consider the possibility of physical abuse when the parent or other adult caregiver:
Offers conflicting, unconvincing, or no explanation for the child's injury
Describes the child as "evil," or in some other very negative way
Uses harsh physical discipline with the child
Has a history of abuse as a child

Signs of Neglect

Consider the possibility of neglect when the child:
Is frequently absent from school
Begs or steals food or money
Lacks needed medical or dental care, immunizations, or glasses
Is consistently dirty and has severe body odor
Lacks sufficient clothing for the weather
Abuses alcohol or other drugs
States that there is no one at home to provide care

Consider the possibility of neglect when the parent or other adult caregiver:
Appears to be indifferent to the child
Seems apathetic or depressed
Behaves irrationally or in a bizarre manner
Is abusing alcohol or other drugs

Signs of Sexual Abuse

Consider the possibility of sexual abuse when the child:
Has difficulty walking or sitting
Suddenly refuses to change for gym or to participate in physical activities
Reports nightmares or bedwetting
Experiences a sudden change in appetite
Demonstrates bizarre, sophisticated, or unusual sexual knowledge or behavior
Becomes pregnant or contracts a venereal disease, particularly if under age 14
Runs away
Reports sexual abuse by a parent or another adult caregiver

Consider the possibility of sexual abuse when the parent or other adult caregiver:
Is unduly protective of the child or severely limits the child's contact with other children, especially of the opposite sex
Is secretive and isolated
Is jealous or controlling with family members

Signs of Emotional Maltreatment

Consider the possibility of emotional maltreatment when the child:
Shows extremes in behavior, such as overly compliant or demanding behavior, extreme passivity, or aggression
Is either inappropriately adult (parenting other children, for example) or inappropriately infantile (frequently rocking or head-banging, for example)
Is delayed in physical or emotional development
Has attempted suicide
Reports a lack of attachment to the parent

Consider the possibility of emotional maltreatment when the parent or other adult caregiver:
Constantly blames, belittles, or berates the child
Is unconcerned about the child and refuses to consider offers of help for the child's problems
Overtly rejects the child

This is a lot of information...but it is information that can save a life!  I apologize for coping word for word but it is important that we all recognize & understand what is going, and honestly they said it best, on and be part of the solution!!

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Watch this video warning:  it is hearbreaking

Part of the problem or part of the SOLUTION: Bullying

Before you read this click this link and listen to the song while your read.

What is a Bully?  What happens when a child is bullied?  

This is a growing problem with our children.  Do we blame the bully?  Do we blame the parent?  Do we blame society?  I believe that we all have some blame here....Even if you do not have a child.  How many times have we "watched" someone being bullied and did NOTHING!  If we do nothing than nothing will change.  

The following is taken from Dr. Phil's website about Bullying.  I love his approach and his advice so this is word for word on what he says:
Warning Signs of BullyingBullying is:
Intentional, aggressive behavior
Imbalance of power
Repeated over time
Physical, verbal intimidation
Exclusion
Cyber harassment
Warning signs that your child may be the victim of bullying:
1. Makes up excuses not to go to school
2. Is often angry, sad or depressed, withdrawn, self-loathing and emotionally erratic
3. Frequently hurt by a particular person or group of people
4. Frequently picked on in the presence of other people
5. Mistakes are turned into a big deal by someone
6. Belongings are often stolen or taken
7. Always being confronted with lies/rumors
How parents encourage bullying in their own children:

• Exercise absolute control over child

• Threaten the child with spankings or other violence

• Attempt to humiliate or embarrass the child as a way to punish them

• Rule by fear

• Push competition and contest too much

• Teach their child that mistakes are unacceptable

• Tell their child what to say, do or think 

If your child is being picked on by a bully, sit down with him or her and go over this list of Do's and Don'ts to keep them safe: 
1. Don't get into a fistfight with a bully or try to retaliate in other ways.
2. Don't believe the insults about you.
3. Don't overestimate how much power a bully has over you.
4. Don't think that bullying will stop if you ignore it.
5. Don't waste time in places online where bullies target you.
6. Don't be afraid to think of new ways to solve the conflict.
7. Don't believe you deserve to be picked on.
8. Do get real about bullying and how it makes you feel.
9. Do get angry, but keep anger under control.
10. Do write down how you feel.
11. Do learn to say and believe good things about yourself.
12. Do speak confidently when telling a bully not to physically touch you.
13. Do work on developing at least one good relationship with a classmate, neighbor and/or older child.
14. Do walk or run away if a bully tries to hurt you.

We can all do something or we can all do nothing.  If you choose to do nothing remember these children, whether they are the bully or the victim, will be running our Country when we are old.  It takes each of us to stop this problem.  

Simple steps to help:

If you are the parent of the bully STEP UP and help your child.  

If you are the parent of the victim STEP IN and help.

If you witness a bully and a victim STEP OVER to them and stop it.


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Part of the problem or Part of the SOLUTION: Domestic Violence

You can either be part of the solution or 

part of the problem.  

I hate to think that, as a society, we have become self centered to the point of we are now part of the problem and not part of the solution.  There are so many things that are in our control that we choose to ignore.  




One serious problem we have today is:

Domestic violence:  (According to Domestic Violence Statistics)

1. Every 9 seconds in the US a woman is assaulted or beaten.
2. Around the world, at least one in every three women has been beaten, coerced into sex or otherwise abused during her lifetime. Most often, the abuser is a member of her own family.
3. Domestic violence is the leading cause of injury to women—more than car accidents, muggings, and rapes combined.
4. Studies suggest that up to 10 million children witness some form of domestic violence annually.
5. Nearly 1 in 5 teenage girls who have been in a relationship said a boyfriend threatened violence or self-harm if presented with a breakup.
6. Everyday in the US, more than three women are murdered by their husbands or boyfriends.
7. Ninety-two percent of women surveyed listed reducing domestic violence and sexual assault as their top concern.
8. Domestic violence victims lose nearly 8 million days of paid work per year in the US alone—the equivalent of 32,000 full-time jobs.
9. Based on reports from 10 countries, between 55 percent and 95 percent of women who had been physically abused by their partners had never contacted non-governmental organizations, shelters, or the police for help.
10. The costs of intimate partner violence in the US alone exceed $5.8 billion per year: $4.1 billion are for direct medical and health care services, while productivity losses account for nearly $1.8 billion.
11. Men who as children witnessed their parents’ domestic violence were twice as likely to abuse their own wives than sons of nonviolent parents.

Here are 11 reasons why you should be part of the solution.  You don't have to get physically involved you just have to OPEN YOUR EYES and be there for someone who is living through this.  If you suspect a friend, family member or co-worker is suffering with Domestic Violence....ASK them.

According to Oprah and Information from the New York State Office for the Prevention of Domestic Violence, www.opdv.state.ny.us. Copyright © NYS Office for the Prevention of Domestic Violence:

The only way to know for sure if someone you know is being abused is to ask. One of the common myths about battered women is that they don't want to talk about their victimization. While many do make efforts to hide the battering, they often do so because they fear being embarrassed, their partner finding out, being blamed, not being believed, or being pressured to do something they're not ready or able to do.

What you should do:

Believe her.
And let her know that you do. If you know her partner, remember that batterers most often behave differently in public than they do in private.

Listen to what she tells you.
If you actively listen, ask clarifying questions and avoid making judgments and giving advice. You will most likely learn directly from her what it is she needs.

Build on her strengths.
Actively identify the ways in which she has developed coping strategies, solved problems and exhibited courage and determination, even if her efforts have not been completely successful. Help her to build on these strengths.

Validate her feelings.
It is common for women to have conflicting feelings—love and fear; guilt and anger; hope and sadness. Let her know that her feelings are normal and reasonable.

Avoid victim-blaming.
Tell her that the abuse is not her fault. Reinforce that the abuse is her partner's problem and his responsibility. However, refrain from "bad-mouthing" him.

Take her fears seriously.
If you are concerned about her safety, express your concern without judgment. Simply say, "Your situation sounds dangerous and I'm concerned about your safety."

Offer help.
When it's appropriate, offer specific forms of help and information. If she asks you to do something you're willing and able to do, do it. If you can't or don't want to, say so and help her identify other ways to have that need met.

Be an active, creative partner in her safety-planning effort.
The key to planning is to take the problem, consider the full range of available options, evaluate the risks and benefits of different options, and identify ways to reduce the risks.

Support her decisions.
Remember that there are risks attached to every decision a battered woman makes. If you truly want to be helpful, be patient and respectful of her decisions.

What you should not do:

If you think a woman you know is being abused, don't wait for her to come to you. If she does confide in you, don't judge or blame her or her decisions—even if you don't agree with them. Don't pressure her into acting if she's not ready. Don't offer advice if it's not appropriate, and don't put conditions on your support of her.

Read more: http://www.oprah.com/relationships/A-Suburban-Mothers-Nightmare-Captured-on-Tape-How-Can-I-He#ixzz240Wbv9pa

Please watch this video and spread the word about Domestic Violence.

Follow this blog for more information on Problems that we can be PART OF THE SOLUTION!

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Checking your furnace...it's that time

Summer is coming to an end and Fall is right around the corner.  When you live in an area that can go from 80 to 40 overnight it's important to check your heating system early.

First thing you should do is replace your heater's air filter.  This should be done every month during the months you use your furnace....and while you are there clean around the vents, the furnace and the baseboard.  

Turn it on and make sure it is working properly.  If you have an older furnace call professionals to have it checked.  Old furnaces will cost you more money than getting yours updated or replace.  Get three bids and have each company EXPLAIN to you what needs to be done and TAKE NOTES!  When you take notes you can compare what each company told you.  If your notes have three different approaches or problems time to get on the phone and call additional professionals.  Another good reason to do this now is we all hate the "smell" of turning the furnace on for the first time.  If you do it now you can have your doors and windows open.

Programmable thermostats can help you save money. It takes less energy to warm a cool home than to maintain a warm temperature all day long. Properly using your programmable thermostat could cut your heating costs from 20 to 75 percent.  A programmable thermostat allows you to automatically turn down the heat when you're away at work or when you're sleeping at night, and then boost the temperature to a comfortable level when you need it. Here is a link for suggested temperatures.

When it starts to get cooler it's time to change the direction of your ceiling fans.  In the wintertime your fans should be going clockwise.  Here is a link that shows you.

Move your furniture away from heating vents.  

Fall is one of my favorite seasons....except that it means that winter is soon upon us.

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You didn't see me

Blind spots..... and what they mean to motorcycles.  We all have them.  Knowing this can save your life or the life of another.

According to Robert Schaller, Road Trip America:  "Where are your blind spots? That depends on the vehicle. A car typically has blind areas at the sides near the rear of the vehicle, meaning you cannot see anything in these areas by looking in your correctly-adjusted mirrors. Other vehicles may be blind to anything that is directly behind. Vehicles in which the driver sits very high may have forward-quarter blind spots—they may not be able to see anything low to the ground in front or to the sides near the front."
Our blind spots are dangerous for everyone around us...whether they drive a vehicle or ride a motorcycle....BUT they are much more dangerous for those who are on two wheels.  This is because of the obvious reason...when you hit a car in your blind spot the car takes the impact...when you hit a motorcycle it is the PERSON takes the impact. 

Watch this video of a real accident that have happened to motorcycles because of blind spots.

Great lesson to learn here

So how do you protect yourself and others while driving?  Always look TWICE to save a LIFE.  Make sure you see them so this doesn't happen.  Watch this video

Now we are going to make it touch you a little bit more.  Click this video and come back to this page and read this poem while the music plays.

You Didn't See Me

I saw you hug your purse closer to you in the grocery store line.

But, you didn't see me put an extra $10.00 in the collection plate last Sunday.

I saw you pull your child closer when we passed each other on the sidewalk.

But, you didn't see me playing Santa at the local mall.

I saw you change your mind about going into the restaurant.

But, you didn't see me attending a meeting to raise more money for the hurricane relief.

I saw you roll up your window and shake your head when I drove by.

But, you didn't see me driving behind you when you tossed your cigarette butt out the car window.

I saw you frown at me when I smiled at your children.

But, you didn't see me when I took time off from work to run toys to the homeless kids.

I saw you stare at my long hair.

But, you didn't see me and my friends cut ten inches off for Locks of Love.

I saw you roll your eyes at our leather coats and gloves.

But, you didn't see me and my brothers donate our old coats and gloves to those that had none.

I saw you look in fright at my tattoos.

But, you didn't see me cry as my children where born and how I have their names written upon my heart.

I saw you change lanes while rushing off to go somewhere.

But, you didn't see me going home to be with my family.

I saw you complain about how loud and noisy our bikes can be.

But, you didn't see me when you were changing the CD and drifted into my lane.

I saw you yelling at your kids in the car.

But, you didn't see me pat my child's hands, knowing he was safe behind me.

I saw you reading the newspaper or map as you drove down the road.

But, you didn't see me squeeze my wife's leg when she told me to take the next turn.

I saw you race down the road in the rain.

But, you didn't see me get soaked to the skin so my son could have the car to go on his date.

I saw you run the yellow light just to save a few minutes of time.

But, you didn't see me trying to turn right.

I saw you cut me off because you needed to be in the lane I was in.

But, you didn't see me leave the road.

I saw you waiting impatiently for my friends to pass.

But, you didn't see me…I wasn't there.

I saw you go home to your family.

But, you didn't see me…Because I died that day you cut me off.

I was just a biker...

A person with friends and a family.

BUT, YOU DIDN'T SEE ME!!

Author Unknown

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Please share this blog with everyone you know.

Please share your stories in the comment section

Motorcycle crash facts

It's Sturgis week and motorcycles are everywhere.  Whether the rider is a recreational rider or one who rides 8-12 months a year...their safety is in YOUR hands.





The facts of motorcycle crashes:  Provided by the U.S. Department of Transportation:  (2010)

• 51% of all motorcycle fatalities collied with another type of motor vehicle.
• 1,999 of the two vehicle fatal crashes involved motorcycles and another type of motor vehicle.
• In 770 of these fatal crashes the other type of vehicle was turning left while the motorcycle was going straight, passing or overtaking another vehicle.
• In 446 of these crashes both the motorcycle and the other vehicle were going straight.

It's not just the young ones who are hurt in motorcycle crashes.  Inexperience plays a factor but some to not start riding until later in life. 


borrowed from http://www.nhtsa.gov/Safety/Motorcycles

• The average age of motorcycle rider fatalities is 42.
• The 40+ age group makes up 39% of motorcycle fatalities.

This age group are MOTHERS, FATHERS, SONS, DAUGHTERS, AUNTS, UNCLES!!!  This age group has MANY people in their lives that need them to come home safely and it is up to everyone to do their part in making this happen!

Yes there are other factors in motorcycle crashes and fatalities such as speeding, alcohol and, yes the rider was, not wearing a helmet.  These factors are out of YOUR control.  What is in YOUR control is always looking out for motorcycles when you are behind the wheel.  As drivers it is OUR responsibility to drive safe and protect ourselves and everyone else on the road.  We cannot control all factors but we do have the ability to control what WE do and how WE drive.

Please drive safe and watch for motorcycles.

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Motorcycle safety: Inattentional Blindness

"inattentional blindness". Put simply, it means that if you are not expecting to see something, you won't see it. (Motorcycle Council of NSW, Inc)


According to the Motorcycle council of NSW, Inc. Almost Two out of Three (61%) multi-vehicle crashes involving a motorcycle the "other" driver was at fault.  If the multi-vehicle accident happened at an intersection that percentage is raised to 71%. 
Great messages from the Motorcycle Council of NSW, Inc:

"There is also evidence that drivers who lack awareness of motorcyclists are more likely to be involved in crashes with motorcycles (Hurt, 1981)."

"Lack of attention and driver attitude to the driving task are also major road safety issues. Poor driving practices such as changing lanes on curves and failing to maintain crash avoidance space or to check over the shoulder are compounded when drivers divide their attention between other tasks such as eating or using mobile telephones."

"These findings are important and suggest that motorcycle crashes could be reduced by changing motorists expectations and perceptual behaviour. This could involve changing road safety messages to be more specific by establishing patterns of expectation with lists and labels. Rather than exhorting drivers to look to see if anything is coming, the message should be, for example to check for any "motorcyclists". Such strategies could have a major impact particularly on the 55% of all multi-vehicle motorcycle crashes that occur at intersections."

We have all been saddened by Officer Matthew Tyner who died recently, in the line of duty, while riding his motorcycle and through his death maybe we can raise awareness of our actions when we are behind the wheel.

When you do not pay attention a person riding a motorcycle could pay for it with their LIFE!  This 20 second video shows you how quickly not doing YOUR job as a responsible driver can cause devastating outcomes.  This happened at an intersection and although the statistics show it is 71% the fault of the driver...in this situation the other driver is 100% WRONG!

Please drive safe and watch for motorcycles.

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When you don't watch for motorcycles people can die

This week is being dedicated to motorcycle safety as we are currently in Sturgis week 2012. 






Let me explain to those of you who do not understand motorcycles.....just because they can go faster, maneuver easier does not mean they can avoid YOU if you don't see them.  They are trusting each and every person driving four plus wheels to be paying attention to what is around you.  Honestly, when you are driving you should always be doing this anyway...but those on bikes are trusting YOU with THEIR lives.

I have written about distracted drivers and how quickly it can go from bad to worse.  Take that text you send to tell your friend you are five minutes away.....going 55 miles per hour you will travel the length of a football field. 

According to the Colorado Department of Transportation in 2010 1 in 5 traffic fatalities were motorcyclists.  I know there are arguements that these numbers are high because Colorado does not have mandatory helmet laws.  There are pros and cons about this law but that is not what I want to focus on....I want to focus on if you are watching for motorcycles and you are paying attention YOUR actions will not cause an accident.  Those of us who ride motorcycles take a higher risk of injury because we are on two wheels, we have less protection than you do in your vehicles and it is harder to see us IF YOU AREN'T paying attention and looking over your shoulder when you change lanes.  (This should be common practice no matter what.)


Yes, more often than not, motorcycle accidents happen to the "less experienced" riders than the one's who have been riding forever BUT we all started out as inexperienced drivers at one time or another no matter what we drove and no matter if they have only one year experience or 40 years experience riding a motorcyle their lives are precious to someone and no one should be hurt or lose their lives because of a distracted driver....no matter what they drive.
Watch this video on how quickly an accident can happen when you aren't watching for motorcycles.

If each person who gets behind the wheel of a car, truck, semi and, yes even a motorcycle pay attention to their surroundings we can all be safer.

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The unspoken injury of car accidents

We all know the common injuries from a car accident; back, neck, broken bones, etc....what we don't often know about, realize or talk about is the injury that happens to a marriage after the car accident.

Car accident injuries can last a long time.  At first the spouse is understanding, caring and willing to do everything while you recover.

When the stress of your injuries, stress of loss of income, stress of medical bills, stress of "doing it all" will eventually cause problems in a marriage.

It is hard for the healthy spouse to do everything.  It is even harder for the injured spouse who is used to doing things...watching others take care of them.

It is hard for the healthy spouse to take the children to all their school events, recreational events, appointments.  It is even harder for the injured spouse to miss these events.

Resentment begins to build from both spouses.....the healthy one resents the injured one because they have to "do it all" and the injured one resents the healthy one because they can do it all.

In my personal experience my husband was very caring.......in the beginning.  Then he became very resentful.  Then he started to tell me to quit "exaggerating" my injuries.  Then he went from not believing I was ever hurt...I just wanted to lie around for eight months.  The he went OUT THE DOOR.

There is a saying "Your friends know you when times are good, You know your friends are when times are bad."  I guess this will work in a marriage also.

The worst thing that you can do is stop communicating with each other and start complaining to others.  If you are the healthy spouse try to understand that the injured spouse has to deal with the PAIN of the accident and deal with the inability to help out after the accident.  If you are the injured spouse understand that the feelings of the healthy spouse is normal.  Talk, communicate and be there for each other.

I have to tell you about Carol Zeisler at Zeisler & Associates, Attorney At Law, PC.  She understands the stress you are going through at home.  She listens to her clients.  She understands her clients.  She is there to help her clients outside of the "legal" aspects of a car accident.  Visit their website for more information.

PTSD after car accidents

Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder is more than just returning soldiers.  According to PTSD Support Car Accidents are the Leadin Cause for PTSD in the General Population.

This News release also goes on to say that OVER three million people a year are involved in car accidents which cause serious bodily injury and psychological distress.  10-45 PERCENT of those injured later suffer from PTSD!!

It makes sense:  Car accidents cause TRAUMA which is the most frequent kind of trauma experienced by American men and the second most experienced by American women.

Let's go through the sequence of events when involved in a car accident:

• Parties involved check for injuries if able.
• 911 is called
• Police and Emergency Responders show up
• Go see a Doctor (whether it be by ambulance from the scene of the accident or later)
• Physical injuries are treated

Now let's go through what happens after the physical injuries are treated:

• Fear of driving or riding as a passenger
• As most accidents happen close to home driving by the scene of the accident is a constant reminder
• The simple task of daily driving is changed

If you do not have a person in your life that can recognize the signs and symptoms of PTSD or Depression it will progress into something that is harder to treat.

Doctors, Chiropractors, Attorney's and all care Physicians need to recognize the signs and symptoms to help before it gets too out of control.

Signs to look out for are

1. Depression.  Watch and listen for signs, "you wouldn't understand" start to think about the value of their life, possible abuse of drugs and/or alcohol.
2. Isolation:  If you find them not doing the "things they used to do" with their friends, family, etc. or they become distant from everyone.
3. Rage:  If they strike out for no reason, or little reason and it happens with increased frequency.
4. Avoidance of Feelings: Alienation of family friends.  Cannot appreciate the joys in life.

These are just a few but if you or a loved one has been involved in a car accident TALK TO YOUR DOCTOR before you feel any of these symptoms so you are both prepared if it should happen.

Zeisler & Associates, Attorney At Law, PC only does Personal Injury and understands all the aspects of a car accident...not just the physical and legal ones.

Visit their website for more information