Just a few jokes to lighten your day:
- A client calls up his insurance agent and tells him he needs to file a claim. The agent says “Tell me what happened?” The client tells him and the agent says “I’m sorry but that’s not covered.” The client says “well, let me explain better what happened.” The agent says “I´m sorry but that´s not covered either.” The client says ” I´ll tell you what, you tell me what´s covered and I´ll tell you how it happened!” (Insurance-finder.info)
- Mr. James Barricks, was a rich old man was dying from a rare disease. On his deathbed, he called for his insurance agent, doctor and preacher: "I trusted each you my entire life. Now I want to give each of you $30,000 cash in an envelope to put in my grave. I want to take it with me." Mr. Barricks died and at the funeral, each one placed the envelope on top of the man, then he was laid to rest. On the way from the funeral, in the limo, the doctor confessed "I must tell you gentlemen, I only put $20,000 on top of Mr. Barricks, I wanted buy this new machine that would enable me to diagnose his rare disease and save others. It´s what he would have wanted." Then the preacher said: "I have to confess, I only put $10,000 on top of Mr. Barricks. We needed that money to help more homeless, and it´s what Mr. Barricks would´ve wanted” The insurance agent was angry at both men and said: "I can´t believe both of you, stealing from a dead man. I wrote Mr. Barricks a check for the full $30,000!"
- A drunk wanders into the lounge of a hotel where an insurance convention is being held, intent on causing trouble. He yells, "I think all insurance agents are crooks, and if anyone doesn´t like it, come up and do something about it." Immediately, a man runs up to the drunk and says, "You take that back!" The drunk snears and replies, "Why, are you an agent?" "No," the man replies, "I´m a crook."
- Two insurance salesmen were driving down a country road at high speed and passed a pickup truck with an old couple inside. "Look at those fools, pa! Must be a couple of insurance salesman and they will surely meet their maker soon, I tell you." Well, sure enough, a little while later the couple comes across a bad accident involving the two insurance salesmen. "Well maw, we got to do what any good folk would do and give´m a decent burial." So the couple dug a hole and buried them. Just as they were putting their tools away, a cop drives up. "You folks see this accident?" "No sir, but we knew them dang fools were going to have it when they passed us doing a hunert miles an hour. Well, we finally come across the accident and gave them insurance salesmen a decent burial" "You were sure that they were dead??" "Well, they said they weren´t, but you know how those insurance salesmen exaggerate!"
(Jokes 2, 3 and 4 Barricksinsurance.com)
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