Holiday traditions

What is your holiday tradition?

We are entering the 2012 Holiday season and I'm still living in the summer.  Where did the time go?  

We have Thanksgiving, Christmas and New Years quickly approaching.  We grow up doing holiday traditions one way, we become adults, get married and now what?  We have two people who have celebrated the holidays their entire lives one way and now you have to figure out what to do.  Who gets Thanksgiving, Christmas....and how do you work this so no one is left out or offended.

Do your families help with making this decision or do they put pressure on you to keep your tradition?

Do you alternate years on how you spend the holidays?

Do you start a new tradition at your house and invite both sides?

This is supposed to be a time of cheer.  A time of Love.  A time of togetherness.  Nothing hurts togetherness like family.  I have friends whose families actually make them feel guilty if they spend the holidays with their in-laws.  I have friends whose families embrace the in-laws and combine traditions. What is the reasons for such a difference?  Is it fear of losing something?  Is it the fear of your tradition not caring on?  All traditions "change" over time.  The traditions you grew up with are not the same traditions your parents did. 

Let's look at this.  Two siblings (we are going to make it easy) grow up with one tradition.  The oldest sibling gets married. Now we have 2-4 families to decide holidays....Your mom, dad, their parents, new spouse and their parents and lets not forget any aunts, uncles, siblings, etc they may have.

Whew got that figured out.  new tradition begins.  Now the youngest sibling goes off and gets married.  Are you kidding me!  Now we have 4-8 families having to figure out what to do.

New tradition begins.  Now lets assume that these traditions are working great!  10 years down the road...oops one sibling gets divorced.  Tradition changes again.  

Remarried.  Tradition changes again.

Other sibling gets divorced.

Tradition changes again.

Remarried into a family of six siblings.  Tradition changes again.

Children of siblings grow up and move away.

Tradition changes again.

Children grow up, move away and get married.

Tradition changes again.

So my question is this:  How long does something have to happen before it can be considered a tradition?  

I want to hear from you about how you handled this.  Maybe your story will help someone who is going through this right now.

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